Beelzebub’s Tales About His Second Descent on to the Planet Earth

“But during the day I feared that the same or other unconscionable beings might commit further outrages on my friend’s planetary body, so I decided at least to prevent the possible actualization of what I feared.

“I therefore immediately hired several suitable beings for a great sum of money and, unbeknown to anybody else, had his planetary body removed and temporarily placed in my Selchan, that is, on my raft which was moored not far away on the river Oksoseria, and which I had not disposed of because I had intended to sail on it from there to the sea Kolhidious to our ship Occasion.

“This sad end of my friend’s existence did not prevent his preachings and persuasions about the cessation of Sacrificial-Offerings having a strong effect on many, even on a great many.

“And indeed, the quantity of slaughterings for Sacrificial-Offerings began very perceptibly to diminish and one could see that even if the custom were not abolished completely with time, it would at least be considerably mitigated.

“And, for the time being, that was sufficient for me.

“As there was no reason for me to stay there any longer, I decided to return immediately to the sea Kolhidious and there to consider what to do further with the planetary body of my friend. 

“When I arrived on our ship Occasion I found an etherogram for me from Mars in which I was informed of the arrival there of another party of beings from the planet Karatas, and that speedy return there was desired.

“Thanks to this etherogram a very strange idea came into my head—namely, I thought that instead of disposing of the planetary body of my friend on the planet Earth, I might take it with me and give it to the presence of the planet Mars.