The Attention Deficit Reality
The fundamental challenge of human existence lies not in our circumstances but in our relationship with attention. We live in a perpetual state of dispersed awareness, our energy scattered like coins from a torn pocket. We pay exorbitant prices in attention for the most mundane of experiences.
The Mechanics of Unconscious Living
Consider the simple act of eating. Even when our bodies are satisfied, we continue consuming mechanically, feeding some deeper unconscious compulsion. We disappear into the act itself, losing ourselves in the mechanical process rather than remaining present to the experience. This pattern repeats across all aspects of our lives – in our work, our relationships, and our daily routines.
The tyranny of mechanicality, that “terrible pitiless force,” governs nearly every action we take. Try a simple experiment: attempt to use your non-dominant hand for a basic task like eating or gardening. The sheer difficulty of maintaining this intention reveals the iron grip of our automated behaviors.
The Fragmentation of Attention
Our attention splinters in multiple directions simultaneously. For example:
- A stream of thoughts unrelated to our current activity.
- Emotional currents pulling us into the past or future.
- Demanding physical sensations.
- Unconscious movements.
- Daydreams claiming their share of our consciousness
We are perpetually fragmented, unable to gather our scattered attention into a unified whole. Each fragment demands its energy payment, leaving us depleted and disconnected from the present.
The Economics of Energy
We are spendthrifts, paying $1,000 in energy for experiences worth mere dollars. Our energy flows consistently outward, leaving nothing in reserve for genuine growth. And all this waste happens because do not recognize the true cost of our robot existence. We fritter away our wealth, with no fear for bankruptcy.
Towards Presence
The journey toward greater presence begins with relaxation – not as a passive state, but as an active practice of letting go of unnecessary tensions. Gurdjieff advised using “little reminding factors” – modifications to our environment that can serve as alerts to our mechanical behavior. The work requires more than mere enthusiasm, which quickly wanes when confronted with the true difficulty of the task. What we need is resolution arising from deeper parts of ourselves – parts that rarely manifest in ordinary life and operate on different energies entirely.
The Nature of Real Change
True transformation requires a fundamental shift in direction. It arrives slowly, and painfully, delivered by persistent effort and sincere self-observation. We have to accept our complete helplessness in our current state before real change becomes possible.
The process is similar to financial reform:
- Recognize the current pattern of waste.
- Begin making small, consistent efforts to conserve energy.
- Gradually accumulate internal resources.
- Learn to operate from a place of greater efficiency
The Practice of Effort
The critical factor is not immediate results but the willingness to make consistent effort. Saving pennies that eventually accumulate into wealth, small but regular attempts at presence gradually build a foundation for transformation. The key is learning to extract effort from ourselves more generously, approaching each attempt as if something vital were at stake. Because it is.